


Plagued

by TheBigLoserQueen



Series: Wolf/Bear AU [21]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Angst, Depression, Gen, Genderbending, Heavy Angst, Human, Hybrids, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Interspecies Relationship(s), Multiple Partners, Nuns, Past Sexual Assault, Rape Aftermath, animal/human hybrids
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-20
Updated: 2015-10-20
Packaged: 2018-04-27 08:02:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5040469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBigLoserQueen/pseuds/TheBigLoserQueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prowl still struggles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Plagued

Prowl still had trouble getting out of bed some days. Not because her body ached or felt pain from... what happened. No, that wasn't the case. It was more mentally exhausting, if anything.

Just... getting out of bed was a challenge. Nightmares tended to plague her during the night, making it hard for her to sleep. Everything felt like lead and she remained stuck under the sheets. Eating seemed like a chore. Bathing seemed like wasted energy. She hardly even wanted to walk nowadays. Optimus and the other nuns had to practically force her to get up and take care of herself. Not all the time, but some days were more difficult than others.

She never left the church though. She didn't go outside, she didn't interact with the people, she didn't even tend to the gardens... Even when she would think about it, something told her no. Something was holding her back. The tight clench in her stomach, the cold tingle down her spine... They all came rushing at her whenever she thought about going out into the sunlight. It was just better for her to stay inside, to help conduct the services.

But not when the wolf-men were around.

The nun couldn't stand seeing them. Scavenger had approached her once after a service, when he had been patrolling while his brothers were out hunting or whatever else they did. It had freaked her out so badly that Optimus had to force the poor boy to leave while the other nuns brought her back to her room, the poor woman left in a shaking and crying mess.

She kept her windows locked. The curtains were closed. Even her door was kept sealed. No one could come in unless she allowed them in. But it was mainly to just keep the wolf-men away.

They didn't do anything wrong. She knew this. Astrotrain... the bear-man had been the one to hurt her. Those five didn't do anything. And yet, when she saw them, she remembered. She ignored their warnings, their pleas to stay away from Astrotrain. They had begged her not to be alone with him. She had just believed them to be jealous fools, that their prejudice was unfounded. And then they had argued and she had gone to Astrotrain to complain.

She, against the warnings, allowed herself to be alone with him. Because she had trusted him. And then he took advantage of her and forced her to... to...

How could she face the wolf-men now? After writing them off like fools? How could she simply beg for their comfort after they had warned her so many times to stay away? They had tried so hard to keep her away from him, wanting to keep her safe. Not wanting her to get hurt. But she acted as if she understood better and dismissed them as if they were stupid children.

She was the fool though. And a fool like her couldn't ask for the comfort of others who had warned her of the dangers.

There was a knock on her door. She had left it open that day, so all she had to do was give a soft noise for them to come in. When she saw it was Optimus, she said nothing and looked at her feet.

The priest flinched at the sight. Primus, Prowl... She looked so tired. And sad. And... broken. He had never seen her like this and it was almost too disturbing. She looked so thin and pale; he feared her weight loss. She just sat there, on her bed at the corner, wrapped up in blankets like a chilled child in the middle of winter. It had been one of the worse days - she didn't even come out for breakfast that morning.

Her knew Sister Glyph had at least given her a bath and changed her clothes. Now they just needed to get her to eat today... Even if it was only some bread and soup. Just anything to put weight back onto her. Despite praying to Primus every chance they got and knowing he would eventually reach her, they still worried relentlessly.

But that was not why he was here. Not at the moment.

"Prowl."

She nudged her head to show that she heard him.

"... Scrapper is here. He wants to talk to-"

"Send him away."

It was quick and harsh, but her voice was cracked. He could see her hands gripping the blanket tighter as she buried her head into her knees. Optimus didn't know if it was better to let Scrapper talk to her or not. Would it help her heal? Maybe, but... Right now, he just didn't want to make things worse for her. Yet...

The boys came by every day. Every day and every evening, hoping to talk to Prowl. After what happened with Scavenger, they didn't attend any church services to try and corner her. But Optimus knew one of them would always come by and sleep outside her window during the night, as if to protect her in case that... Astrotrain ever returned. They worried so much and he understood why they just wanted to see her. It hurt to turn them away each time, their faces always growing more and more distraught with every denial.

"Prowl... They just want to know you're all right. They're worried-"

"Send. Him. _Away."_

"... Very well. I'll have Sister Moonracer bring you something to eat later."

Prowl said nothing as he left and closed the door behind her. All she could do was hug herself tighter and press her face more into her knees. She couldn't face them. Not now, not like this. She wasn't ready. She just... She needed more time. She just couldn't bear to face the reality of her situation.

If she had just listened to them... This wouldn't have happened. She wouldn't have to deal with the nightmares, the pain, the fear... None of it would plague her like some phantom. But now she had to live with it. These were the consequences of her actions. She made these choices; now she had to live with them.

The thought only made her cry into her knees, wishing it would just go away.


End file.
